JC: Miss Black and Twilight had a heated exchange this week leading to their match tonight.

RW: I'll say, those blockheads admonished each other about making assumptions and then proceeded to do so concerning each other.

JC: Since when is your vocabulary so...expansive?

RW: There you go, doing the same to me. You know what they say about assuming.

JC: I don't think we can say that on TV.

RW: Sure you can, just like you can say "bitch" and "ho."

JC: Well, you just did.

RW: I know, that's what I said, "you can say those words on TV."

"Basketcase" by Green Day hums out of the speakers as Twilight makes his way down to the ring. He takes his time entering, and sits in a corner to wait for his opponent. No music is forthcoming, and no one comes down the ramp. Suddenly, there is movement in the audience. Lucretia runs with lightning speed, jumps up the steel stairs and is upon Twilight before he even knows what's going on. She reaches over the ropes and slaps him into a chokehold. The referee calls for the bell.

Twilight scrambles to his feet and whips Lucretia over his shoulders and into the ring five feet in front of him. The two stand still momentarily, sizing each other up. Twilight attacks first, delivering several blows to Lucretia's body before giving her a hard slap across the face.

JC: Gimme my money!

RW: I think that's the most sexist thing I've ever heard.

Blood trickles out of the corner of Miss Black's mouth, she licks it clean, and now has a thirst for more. She slaps Twilight right back, then kicks him hard in the gut. With Twilight doubled over, she delivers a pump-handle slam. Twilight is back up quickly, launching himself so that he spears Lucretia. From his position of advantage, he holds her down with one arm and sends a flurry of jabs at her head with the other. After a time, he tires and gets off of her but holds onto her hair. He lifts his oppponent up with him and punches her several more times before sending her through a death valley driver.

RW: She's light, that's the only way he was able to pull that one off.

Lucretia is clearly affected, she stirs slowly thereafter while Twilight stalks her. When she's halfway up, Twilight bounces off the ropes and heads towards Miss Black. She reacts quickly, drop-kicking him. Twilight reels backward and Lucretia chases her prey. She whips him against the ropes and lands a stationary kick on his return trip with her heel. Twilight's face splits right open and blood splatters as he hits the ground.

RW: Good God!

JC: Actually, "she-devil"- and don't use the Lord's name in vain.

RW glowers at JC before returning his attention to the ring, where Lucretia has covered her hands in Twilight's blood while handling the latter as she brought him to his feet. She winds up and puts her entire weight behind a monster left hook to her opponent's jaw.

Blood now flows freely from Twilight's mouth as well. Twilight only smiles hazily. Seeing this, Lucretia comes in for a sadistic, messy kiss. After that, seemingly scandalized, she slaps him across the mouth and follows with a Diamond Cutter.

JC: I bet she doesn't seem like a delusional little girl to Twilight now.

RW: She just kissed him and then acted like she was offended by an unwanted advance!

Miss Black wastes no time in covering.

Ref: One...Two...Three!

JC: We've got a championship match coming up for you next.

As the first note of "Chaosweaver" by Scar Symmetry hits, the video screen quickly strobes between a skull and a clover. The strobing speeds up until the snare drum hits and a logo of the skull and clover tied together in barbed wire shows as Breeden walks out in his ring attire and leather jacket, carrying a barbed-wire bat in his hands. He stops at the ring steps and pulls out a can of Guinness. He proceeds to beat the can open on the steps until it foams out. He pours the foaming content into his mouth and down his shirt, then discards the can into the audience. He then gets inside the ring with bat in hand, climbs the turnbuckle, and raises the bat high.

RW: What a waste of beer. Jerk.

JC: Totally unprofessional, drinking before a match.

Zybala is already in the ring and comes out fast in defense of his title as the referee rings the bell. His initial rush culminates in a furious clothesline that slams Breeden to the mat. Breeden is right back up, countering with several boots to the gut. Once Zybala is doubled over, the head of the House of Hate follows with several shots to the Champ's kidneys. Breeden then whips Zybala to the ropes but the Champ uses the momentum to catch Breeden off guard with a hurricanrana, which he transitions into a pin.

JC: Great execution by one of SFT's rising stars.

RW: Too early though, Breeden's kicked out before the ref can even begin the count.

After breaking the pin, Breeden sweeps Zybala's legs out from under him. He quickly grabs the Champ's exposed extremities, applying a fierce ankle lock to Zybala's right ankle. The angle at which it is applied is almost sickening.

RW: Break it! Break his freakin' ankle!

JC: Been hanging out with Miss Black too much?

RW: That was ONE time- and I thought she was Dita Von Tesse. Geez, a guy has a few too many and...

JC: It's not like she's ugly or anything.

RW: I wasn't saying she was. It's just...Dita is Dita...and Lucretia is Lucretia.

JC: Shouldn't we have had this conversation earlier? Say, during Lucretia's match?

Meanwhile, in the ring, Zybala is quite verbal about the pain he is feeling. Desperately, he tries to claw his way toward the ropes whilst the referee pleads with the Champ to tap out. Breeden adds insult to injury, kicking the Champ in the stomach from his angle of advantage and effectively ending Zybala's attempt. Breeden applies further pressure to the ankle lock.

JC: I'm not sure how much longer Zybala can hold out.

RW: You know, I think Dita and Lucretia know each other...They're both smokin' so...

JC: Why not pay attention to the match like you should be? You're seeing the SFT Intercontinental Champion defending his title. This guy deserves some respect; the least you can do is give your full attention to the match.

RW: These snorefests just seem to be so long. If I were at home, I'd probably flip the channel for a minute, maybe make a sandwich, then come back to it when I thought the action was getting good. Really, who pays attention?

Just then, the IC Champ rolls onto his back, kicks Breeden swiftly in both knees, and then in the face.

JC: Jesus, Larry, and Joseph!

RW: Excuse me?

JC: I'm not cursing if I use two of three.

RW: You're an idiot.

Zybala limps to his feet, clearly favoring his right leg. He chops Breeden several times in the throat and connects with a few body blows. The Champ follows this with a belly-to-belly suplex. He stomps on Breeden four times with his good foot, but is forced to back off after supporting his weight on one foot for so long. Zybala struggles to to lift Breeden, administers chest slap after chest slap, then powerslams him.

JC: Looks like Zybala had some trouble there and may have stressed that ankle.

RW: Zybala with an elbow drop. Heck, if you can't be effective on your feet, might as well give it a shot off your feet.

Zybala seems to take that advice to heart, despite not hearing it, and slaps Breeden into a camel clutch. The latter seizes the opportunity, chopping frantically at the IC Champ's right ankle.

JC: His aim's a little high because of that camel clutch, but his heart is in the right place.

The pressure pays off, Zybala releases the hold and Breeden presses his advantage, chopping at the IC Champ as he gets to his feet, then following up with an arm drag. He locks Zybala's ankle again.

RW: I guess he can't beat him in a straight wrestling match.

The champ is ready again, flopping around like a fish to keep the pressure off his ankle.

JC: Messy, but effective.

Frustrated, Breeden lets go of Zybala's ankle and picks the latter up by the head. Breeden then chokeslams Zybala, picks him up again, follows with a half-nelson, picks the champ up again, and drops him with a german suplex. Seemingly satisfied, he covers.

Ref: One...Two...

JC: Zybala kicks out!

RW: I bet he had to dig real deep to pull that off.

Breeden slams the mat with his fist, and heads for Zybala's legs again, this time putting him into a figure-four leglock. Zybala howls in pain before starting to swing his body back and forth, screaming aloud each time. After gaining enough leverage, the Champ rolls onto his stomach, reversing the figure-four into a sharpshooter.

JC: What a display of athleticism!

RW scoffs: Those lightweights always pull that kind of garbage.

Breeden appears stunned for a moment, then begins to reach awkwardly for the Champ.

JC: The Irish Assassin looks to be desperate.

After much exertion, Breeden grabs a hold of his opponent and slaps him into The Grip of Hatred!

RW: That just doesn't look right.

Neither competitor's grip slacks as they teeter back and forth, the referee unsure what to do. Finally, they tip to one side, and onto the ropes. The referee quickly steps in and separates them, which results in Breeden falling out of the ring, and Zybala falling a few feet away from the ropes. Both stars get up slowly as the referee begins to count Breeden out. He of the House of Hate procures the barbed-wire bat from seemingly out of nowhere and tosses it into the ring. For his part, Zybala's ankle really hampers him, having been adversely affected by the weird cross-face chicken wing/sharpshooter combination that he and his opponent had been locked in. He never notices the bat, which Breeden simply ignores as he climbs back into the ring. Breeden grabs Zybala, drags him so that he's over the barbed-wire bat and sends him through the motions of a spinning snow plow.

JC: From Dublin with Love, sucka. Technically, it's legal since

RW: It's lights out for Zybala, but we'll have to see what the Commish has to say about legality.

Breeden positions Zybala's body over the bat, being sure to scrape it along the barbed-wire and covers.

Referee: One...two...THREE!

24 x 6 from Tool hits as Xavier makes his way to the ring to mix reaction.

Ring of Fire by Cash hits as Jude makes his way to the ring with a huge pop from the crowd.

RW: Well this promises to be a good match.

The bell rings as Jude and Xavier stare at each other they then shake hands as the match begins.

RW: mutual respect here by both guys here.

Jude with a uppercut on Xavier who then retailiates with a kick to the stomach and a swinging neckbreaker as Jude holds his head in pain. Xavier tries a figure 4 but Jude kicks him in the face. Jude now with a double axe handle. Jude nails a slingshot suplex on Xavier and covers 1…2….kickout!

JC: That was close.

Jude with a drop toe hold but again just a 2 count. Jude tries a banzai drop but X picks up the knees and nails Jude. X now with a moonsault! Nails it covers Jude 1….2…kickout! Xavier nails a top rope elbow drop on Jude then a top rope guillotine leg drop!

RW: Ouch!

Xavier tries for a pin but gets again a 2 count.

Nirvana out of nowhere comes to ringside. Xavier doesn’t see him, Jude is up and spears X but nails the ref as well. Nirvana in the ring nails Saint Jude with a sucker punch and gets away as Xavier gets up not knowing and nails a inverted DDT on Jude. The ref comes through.

JC: What bullshit!

He covers Jude 1….2…..3

Sean Starr is already in the ring as the Boys are Back in Town hits and Glenn Owen makes his way out to the ring with the World Title around his waste. He gets in and smiles at the Starr.

RW: Well considering all that happened this wont take long.

The bell ring and almost as if Glenn heard him he charges at Starr. He nails a clothesline followed by a suplex then a powerslam. Glenn with a neckbreaker then a DDT. Glenn nails a piledriver as he just smiles.

JC: I think Glenn will break Starrs record from a few weeks ago.

Glenn now hits a spinning DDT, Then the famous Flame Thrower as he covers 1…2…3!